The One Where Rachel Takes A Shot To The Guts
Chick Flick Licked. The power of false advertising. It had Jennifer Aniston in it for crying out loud! How was I to know?
The Story:
Clive Owen from The Children of Men doesn’t shag Rachel from Friends, gets blackmailed. Kills Xzibit from Pimp My Ride and Vincent Cassel. David Morrissey who played Gordon Brown in the Deal and was also in Basic Instinct 2 dies. A mercedes gets trashed and 100000 dollars gets lost and gained and lost again. The end.
The Good:
Jennifer Aniston takes one in the guts. This is a justifiable homicide on the grounds of bad acting and being the character in this film played by a cast member from Friends.
Lots of blood. A surprising amount of one-on-one violence.
The bit where the viewer says out loud “That’s Xzibit from MTV’s Pimp My Ride!”
The Bad:
This Movie follows the A-Z Movie-making rule of duff thrillers that says the quickest route including twists and turns is in a straight who-can-say-the-next-line-first line from improbable brief encounter to final destination denouement.
The Verdict:
This involves Pig math. Lose 2 for Friends link. Add 5 for bloody violence beyond the call of duty. Lose 1 again for tricking me, I was expecting an alcohol-fuelled romp of a chick-flick. Lose another one for the no-show shag. Clive Owen from Sin City add 5. I watched this movie, always worth a Pig.
12 Pigs. All scores subject to change.
